Posted on: 2013-03-21 by coldsteelblizzard

Last night ... Wake up in strange house. Look outside, no sign of car. Call work. Landlord comes home. £50 a week. Where have I been living up until now? Phone work to enquire about shift times. "We went through all this last week!" "Oh fuck off Graham. What year is it anyway?" Angry response from Graham. "Sorry but I'm having serious problems with my memory today." I think I have amnesia and presumably must have skipped a couple of years or something. Head downstairs, pass two levels of pub on the way. Get outside and start walking around unfamiliar streets looking for car. Where am I? Where have I been? Pull out phone which seems to be very slick little tablet PC already in satnav mode. Very sharp resolution, stylish graphics. Loaded with games that would shame an amusement arcade. Maybe this would help me find my car. I flick through the contacts and recognise none of them. I must have picked up someone else's phone on the way out of the house so I head back to the pub holding the phone up for the few punters to see if anyone recognises it. Nobody reacts. A group of lads hanging around the top of the stairs upstairs. "Does this belong to one of you?" Cheesy grin. "Aw thanks mate!" "No probs. I wouldn't like to have lost an expensive thing like this." Laughter. I head up towards the residential level to look around for my crappy little Nokia. Nothing. No keys, no phone, no clue where I am or where I'm supposed to be. I head out again. The lads on the first floor have gone and I wonder whether or not the tablet phone was really theirs. Some of the punters on the ground floor chat to me like they know me and I ask about the phone IMD